A Glimpse of Self

I gaze at the mirror everyday
Today I caught a glimpse of myself,
Astonished, I was
To see all that I saw,
The wounds open, and crimson that
I inflicted on myself;
The expressionless patches made up of lies that hide them,
The elevations of my pride alongside the depths of my disgrace;
I saw a child, a boy, a man
When I looked into the mirror today,
Who once was and who will never be
Jaded by technicolour of knowledge, tanned by the heat of love,
I saw tears held back by the vision
And the anger left by submission,
I saw the blackened blisters of guilt
And the scabs on my conscience,
The diminished wrinkles of a smile long forgotten,
The shamefull frowns of deeds rotten;
And a million other substances of existence I witnessed
When I looked in the mirror today,
Amazed I was to see it all and yet, not recognize myself this way.

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Your Fate Absolute

For all the hearts you broke
Yours shall shatter too,
For all the tears, you caused to drop
Your eyes will bleed too,

For all your negligence towards the ones who loved
You too shall roam in disregard,
For all the times you hurt their hearts,
On your soul, they shall inflict searing wounds;

For all those bitter words you spoke
You too shall be verbal abused,
All those tricks you played with the world
Shall soon come back to confuse

For all those times you insulted another
Your pride too shall fall,
All the times, you spent alone in selfish silence
Your cheerful moments would not last,

And all times you did not consider requested pardon
Your words too shall never find, an ear new,
For all those things you stole from them
Your more shall turn into few;

And it is nothing more, or less
It’s the payment of your dues,
Though tragic, in sound and action it is,
It’s your fate absolute.

In disbelief

She accepted his refusal
But
It squeezed out all the passion from her heart
Sucked in all the life from her soul,
Now she roams zombie-like, undead
And the cold words of people don’t instil shiver in her form
The heat of jealousy doesn’t burn her gut,
Phrases of praise have lost their meaning to her
And now, she is as good as The Thinker
Who sits sculpted, contemplating a single moment
Of ache, loss, and grief
Unaware, of people, admirers and haters
She sits accepting his refusal
Like a statue of stone, in disbelief.

Old age and youth

Lately, I have been missing you
Feeling the absence of your warmth
in this cold winter breeze,
I am apologetic
For when you were here
In the hot afternoons of the summer
I missed you out,
And I feel bad for another
Who had missed me so
long back in my youth.

Now I know your sorrow
I know that I have hurt you
But I hope you also know
That I love you like I loved the another
And still do,
And I miss both of you,
I miss my old age and my youth.

Like Always

I just feel sad
So sad, and empty
As those ancient hallways,
Which are lost to ruins and cannot be walked upon;
an emptiness that is in front of the eyes and still unseen,
This silence that reigns over
is so silent, and dumb
That I feel as if I am a corpse
reposing, slowly decomposing in a coffin,
And though it sounds,
and feels disturbing
It is also only the usual
This sorrow, this emptiness
These hallways and the coffin,
This decaying existence- so usual
It fails to make a difference to me,
To me it just feels like run-of-the-mill,
To me this just feels like always.

Leave Poem

Leave Poem

I did not go to the office today

Today, I avoided my work place,

Why? I am unsure

Maybe I just did not feel like today.

All night the previous night

I twisted and tossed and turned in my bed

while my mind in a fit vomited

Puked thoughts all night

And it puked so much,

that there came a little blood

And all I night I could not sleep

Lying awake, neither could I smile

nor could I weep.

When I woke up

the throat of my mind hurt,

From the incessant passage of thorny and prickly thoughts

And now it does not say anything

or think anything

Whilst I cried with a headache.

And the only words that mind could utter

were ‘I am Tired’

And cannot remain in the cage of these thoughts;

It cannot stay wired,

So my soul in the matter interfered

And decided that it did not want to go

to the office today;

for there I shall find people,

who are as alien as the moon

I see their light and the monster that squats

But I don’t see the beauty

I cannot feel the warmth,

So, I decided to not go and see them

I kept my eyes closed and stayed,

And I realised that I do not like what I do there

And hence I go to the office today.